Reflection
by Weatherbug02
Summary: "My name is Hans Westergard. I am three and twenty. I am from the Southern Isles. I tried to murder the Queen and Princess of Arendelle. I should be killed. I need to be killed. I have nothing to live for. Except my frozen heart. " Hans reflects back on what happened in Arendelle. Helsa heavily implied. First Frozen story. *Oneshot*


It was a bright and warm day with just a little bit of frost hanging in the air. Arendelle had just been thawed and everyone was happy, well, except for the Duke of Weselton but that's beside the point. And where was I in all of this? In a cell, imprisoned on my own ship.

I am a traitor. I am a criminal. I am Prince Hans. Well, after my parents hear about this, more like former Prince Hans. I will be executed. And, I should be. Even if I'm not killed, I should be stripped of my title. I deserve it.

I nearly killed the Queen and the Princess trying to become the king. Why did I do it? I am afraid I can't answer that because, frankly, I can't answer it for myself. I got off that ship feeling like a King, believing that I would be the greatest ruler in all of Arendelle and never thinking I would go on it again. I was wrong. So, so wrong.

It all started back in the Southern Isles. My brothers taunted and teased me, saying that I would never do anything worthwhile. I wanted to prove it to them that I could do great things. I realize now that killing a person is not how you achieve those things.

I watched as the French ambassador talked to a servant. I could hear them slightly. They said that I would be returned to my country to hear what my "twelve big brothers have to say" about my wrong doings. Then, I heard the Duke of Weselton fake a back injury and demand to see the Queen.

The Queen. Elsa. What I would give to make her forgive me. What I would do to make her see that that person, the murderous man she had just witnessed, was not who I really I am. Heck, even if I didn't try to kill her and she just looked at me like everyone else, she could easily tell how fake I was. My reflection can't show who I am. It's been covered up by makeup and manner classes and royal life in general.

I wish I could see her again. I wish I could go to my knees and plead for my forgiveness. I wish I could see her beautiful face again.

When I first met Anna, she was adorable and sweet and pretty, but the moment I had laid eyes on Elsa, my entire mindset had changed. For a split second I had considered not to murder her, but my head was too obsessed, my body too driven to give up.

Anna was pretty, but Elsa was beautiful with a hint of mystery attached to her porcelain skin. I knew she hid a secret behind those eyes. A secret she was deathly afraid of. Little did I know of the extent.

When Elsa revealed her powers for the first time in the ballroom, my first instinct was to find her and tell her it was alright, but I didn't. My body wouldn't let me because the greed kept building up. Instead I stayed with Anna.

She ran away. I wanted to go after her, but Anna beat me to it. She left me in charge and rode away. Although I was plotting, I couldn't let Arendelle's people die, so I did what any good king would do. I took care of them.

Anna's horse came back soon enough, but with no Anna. I was genuinely worried about her for an unknown reason. I didn't love her. I knew that, but for some reason I couldn't help it.

I had to go after her. I took men with me and went to find the both of them.

When we found Elsa's castle, everyone was mesmerized. It was made of ice. Flawless and beautiful just like its creator. One thing we did not expect on that mission was to encounter a living snow monster. After several attempts to kill the thing, it fell off her bridge taking me with it. Luckily, I grabbed the bridge and saved me from a tragic demise, but, for a split second, I just considered letting go. My body wouldn't let me.

I was lifted up by some men and we all ran up her partly demolished bridge into the ice palace. I saw her running away probably terrified.

I found her next, in a room about to kill the Duke of Weselton's men. I told her to stop. I told her not to be a monster. She's not a monster, she's just afraid and misunderstood. A lot like me.

Elsa stopped and I was about to go talk to her, but out of the corner of my eye, I saw one of the Weselton men raise a crossbow and aim it at Elsa. I could've let him kill her. It would've been exceptionally easier, but in a split second decision, I stopped him by aiming it upwards.

The arrow flew up and snapped her chandelier and it came crashing to the ground with Elsa in the center. I felt frantic. I had caused it to come down. Relief flooded my body when she ran out of the way, falling, but still managing to avoid most of the shatters of ice.

I remember gently picking her up and riding back to Arendelle with her in my arms. She was incredibly beautiful and I couldn't help but imagine not killing her, but, by then, it was out of the question. I had to do it.

I walked into the cell later that afternoon. She was chained and afraid. I asked her to undo this winter. She asked for her freedom. I didn't tell her that there was no way, but I think she sensed it. I left, leaving her to her thoughts.

I was talking to the foreign dignitaries when Anna came in. She begged me to kiss her. She explained what had happened as I laid her down on the couch. Elsa had frozen her heart. I couldn't imagine the pain of not just the ice, but that it had been put in there by her own sister.

I needed to kiss her. And I would've kissed her. I would've if my own heart wasn't frozen. I would've if I wasn't a prisoner of my own hatred and greed. I would've if I weren't….me.

The look on Anna's face couldn't be described. She really thought I loved her. I broke her heart into a thousand pieces and stomped on it. It was an horrible thing done by a horrible person. And I'm the one who did it.

I left that poor girl alone in the dark. To die. If there's one thing I know about life, it's that someone should never die alone if you could help it. I could've helped her. I could've tried to save her. But, instead I left. I left her to die. The same way I would die. Alone.

The compassionate side of me left my body completely. The good surrendered and the bad had taken over. One look into my eye and you could see it. The hatred. The cold. It was all there and no one could stop me. No one could change my mind.

I once heard an old Norwegian tale about two children, Kai and Gerda, who had fallen victims of the Snow Queen. Kai had a cursed mirror shard put into his eyes and from then on could only see the worst in everything. Eventually Gerda had helped save him with true love.

I am the same way. I don't have mirror shards in my eyes, but it's all the same. I see the worst in everyone and everything. But instead of it being a curse. It's just me. Just me.

They say only true love can thaw a frozen heart. If that's true then I'm doomed. There is no one out there who loves me. My mother did, but she's gone. Only she could love me, but still she could not see through the facade of a perfect complexion, when underneath everything, everyone I may or may not love are mere players in a game. A game of thrones.

After I left and locked the door on Anna, I went to the dining hall and lied to the several of the ambassadors and dukes. I told them that Anna was dead. I have always been an esteemed actor and that came in handy here. I acted distraught and heartbroken. The problem with that was I didn't have a heart to break.

It didn't take long for me to realize that Elsa had escaped. A full out blizzard was circling outside when I opened the door and saw that the wall was broken down. It was bitter cold but I went after her anyway. I wouldn't give up until I was sure I could do nothing else. I would have to been dead for that to happen.

It was like I was the real Snow Queen as I walked, stumbled, crawled, through that blizzard. The cold didn't bother me. I had a goal that I need to reach and the only way I could do that now was to do the thing I had been intending to do since I came up with this plan. Kill the queen.

After what felt like hours of searching, I found her. Elsa was confused and scared. I used that to my advantage. I told her she can't run. She told me to take care of Anna. That couldn't be helped. I needed to break her and there was only one way to do that.

"Your sister is dead!" She gasps. I could almost feel her heart breaking. Two in a day. That has to be some kind of record.

She whispered "No," over and over again. Finally, Elsa crashed to the ground and sobbed. A part of me, the smallest part that contained good wanted me to ache for her. It wanted me to comfort her. But I couldn't.

I unsheathed my sword. Without a second more, I swung it at Elsa. Then, it was as if everything moved in slow motion. Anna was running and jumped in front of Elsa at the last second. Her body froze completely and the force my sword hit the ice at flung me back.

The last thing I remembered before blacking out was hearing Elsa say "No," again. Not noticing or not caring that I tried to murder her. And Failed.

I woke up when the fjord was thawed and we were floating on a ship. I grunted as I stood. I saw Anna unfrozen, Kristoff angry, and Elsa looking hurt, confused maybe. She knows that I tried to kill her, I think. Her back was turned the entire time. Anna saw it all, though.

I asked her an innocent question. "But she froze your heart?" And I got awarded with a comeback and a punch to the face. What did I expect? Her to smile and sit down for tea and tell me every single detail?

After I fell overboard, I was later fished out of the water and thrown in jail. They probably expected me to fight arrest. That's what every criminal does, right? Not this one. I can't escape now. This is my fault I'm in here. I deserve whatever punishment comes my way.

That's how I ended up here. If only someone would believe me. I doubt anyone ever will. I don't even believe myself.

My name is Hans Westergard. I am three and twenty. I am from the Southern Isles. I tried to murder the Queen and Princess of Arendelle. I should be killed. I need to be killed. I have nothing to live for. Except my frozen heart.

A/N: Hello, Frozen fandom! This is my fourth story, and first Frozen. I had this idea in my head for a long time and I just now finished it. Just so you know, I am a MAJOR Helsa shipper. I love Hans, okay? Please review and tell me how it is! Thanks for reading!

Thanks,

Weatherbug02

P.S: Yes, I did get the 'My name is Hans Westergard' thing from Mockingjay.


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